breastfeeding- home and on...

remember how i shared how my complications worsened once i got home?  well, in the midst of all that, i still BF as much as i could.  mostly, football style.  

never did the thought enter my mind to stop.  i couldn't.  i had two little girls who were fighting for their lives, and i needed to do all that i could to protect them.  i had already  had many pregnancy complications, as well as postpartum complications, and  they needed that perfectly good milk that formula could never give them... the nutrients that only breast milk gives. 

when babies stay in the NICU, they have to pass a good amount of tests in order to be discharged... one, being good eating.  my girls were great in every other area... except that.  so, i needed to do it for them.  never did my mind waver in that "this is too hard" or "my body can't take this anymore" or "i'll never have enough milk for them" or "i give up... i only want to do formula."

i BF/pumped as much as i could.  not exclusively.  BF/pumped as much as i could.  i didn't know the tips that i know now.  i remember that i'd have to wake up early in the morning, take a shower, get ready for my nurse to come and pack my wound (remember when i wrote about that?), and make sure that i fed/pumped for the girls before.  i had help then... for the first few weeks with my family in town, and my sister stayed until they were almost three weeks.  
then, i was on my own.  i was terrified.  

how in the world am i going to do this on my own? how am i going to feed them bottles simultaneously?

i cried when my sister left.  

i mean, when you BF twins, maybe it's just me, but... you need someone else to help you and get started... they're already so fragile, and you need to be careful how you position them.  it's really hard to not "bobble" that small doll-size head that's ever so precious.  also, when you BF twins, it takes up a lot of your time.  a lot of your day.  you need to be prepared for that.  YOUR MAIN PRIORITY is to feed your children.  they need nutrition.  nobody else can substitute for that.

so, when my sister left, i was overwhelmed... i mean, every morning she was here, she'd come into my room and take a baby (lay with her, change her, or feed her) while i took care of the other.  she brought me breakfast because, at the beginning, i was often barricaded in my room until noon every day when my husband was at work.  i should go more into that later. :) and, what would i spend my time doing?  BFing or pumping!  obviously, not uploading photos on FB as i fell behind on that and have only recently been able to catch up... :)

i was nervous how i was going to do it on my own.  so, i cried.  i mean, at this point, i was only able to do 50/50% (breastmilk 3-4 oz. per pumping feeding and formula). every time the girls were hungry and i was "out of milk," meaning i had just fed them (not pumped, mind you, will explain later), i'd watch depressingly as my family members would go make up a bottle or heat one up.  it made me that much more driven to BF/pump exclusively.  every bottle i saw then make made me want it so much more.  i knew that it was better for them... but, how?!  i hated that they were getting formula, but what could i do about it?  they needed what i was unable to give at that time.  there had to be a way, though, right? 

i wanted to do 100% BM.  i remember going to the second pediatric appointment (my first with them because remember i was in the hospital?), and the pediatrican (we've since changed for obvious reasons) callously answered me, "i've never seen a mom go past three months BFing twins."  

how insensitive.  you are a jerk.  way to blow the wind out of my sails!

but, i kept reading about twins' moms having "enough" milk for both... or reading that you can truly make enough milk to feed your children.  i wanted that, and didn't know how.  i kept trying to make my milk meanwhile... until i started asking people around when the babies were six weeks...

i learned of another lactation consultant to visit (didn't i see all of you in the hospital?), but didn't want to pay $90 for an office visit (can you imagine ME taking two babies in THEIR carseats to HER HOME office for a "consultation" as she watches me BF twins in a chair?!  AWKWARD!!!) or $160 for a home visit?!  jeez.  rob you! 

so, i started to do my own research…

trial offers for CD

along my research, i remember feeling quite discouraged as i heard all of these different brands, and like i mentioned before, it was quite overwhelming.  i didn't want to spend the $ and buy the wrong diapers.  i mean, don't get me wrong- i don't regret any diapers that i have purchased- none whatsoever.  every diaper has served its purpose and been fine for me, HOWEVER, 


below are some suggestions to "try" CD and see if it's for you... all for very little compared to what you'd pay if you started up a brand new system.  


enjoy!


Granola Babies' CD Trial Offer - based in Costa Mesa, CA; GB gives you the option to "sample" the various diaper choices out there on the market... so you know what you really want to do.
Granola Babies Newborn Trial Offer - based in Costa Mesa, CA; GB gives you the option to borrow the diapers with a refundable deposit!  brilliant.
sweetbottoms baby Diaper Trial - try diapers for a limited amount/time
ReDiaper - purchase gently used diapers/accessories for great deals
Granola Babies' One-Size Cloth Diapers Rental Package -not sure which diapers to buy?  put a refundable down payment/security deposit, "rent" eight popular diapers, and it ends up only costing you $30!
Granola Babies' Tiny Fit AIO Newborn Rentals -same thing as above, except for NBs! :)


great value CD:
Best Value Diapers
Bulk Cloth Diaper
Diaper Shops

do you know of any other CD trial offers?  i did originally write this on 4/3/11, so i apologize for the delay in posting... :)

breastfeeding- hospital stay

my every and only intention was to breastfeed my girls, mostly because it was best for them (and, me!) and the milk is perfectly designed for that baby’s age (God really thought of everything!)!  also, i wanted to breastfeed since they’d be preemies, and it would only benefit them more… meaning, they already held a disadvantage to other full-term babies by being delivered sooner… less time to develop.  

 

immediately, following my babies' birth, i was unable to BF them.  they were taken straightaway to the NICU, given formula with granted permission by my husband, and i was recovering in the recovery room and later in my room.  following a spinal, you really lose ALL feeling in your legs for several hours... such a strange feeling.  i think that i mentioned before how nervous i was that i was going to lose feeling permanently... and, i was SO thankful when it returned. :)

anyway, when i got to my room, i found out that they were being given formula! NOT.PART.OF.MY.BIRTH.PLAN!  those birth plans often get thrown out the window when you have serious situations take place, such as babies in the NICU!  i quickly asked for a pump, and to start pumping (had nowhere to go until i regained feeling in my legs and felt better to go see our girls).  they gave me the attachments and the hospital grade double electric breast pump, medela symphony.

first of all, this machine was AWE-SOME (i'll get into this later)!  very quiet and quite efficient!  i pumped, and it was... WEIRD.

my girls are going to be doing this?  

how does it feel? i was asked.

weird.  no other explanation. 

i started pumping... just for stimulation.  the following day is when i got some colostrum, and i was beyond thrilled!  i put it in a little bottle and took it down to the NICU.  i remember feeling a bit embarrassed when i saw how much formula they were being given (up to 20-30cc's), and here i stroll in (or, shall i say pushed in my wheelchair) with my itty bitty bottle of C... maybe 10cc's (ml's, one-third of an oz)  yet, the nurses didn't care!  they were so happy that i even had something!  they took the tiny amount and inserted into the girls' mouths with small syringes.  of course, they followed with formula.  no!  i hated seeing that, and it only gave me more motivation to try and give them milk.  still, mine was still on its way to grace me with its presence. :)

meanwhile, i kept pumping, and finally had a breakthrough two days later.  i started to get quite engorged; it feels AWFUL!  it feels like marbles/little saucers are layered all in/around your boobs... and they start to get rock hard.  it was so painful.  it also happens FAST.  one night, i was telling my husband and mom that they were feeling quite full, and then, BAM!

ding-dong!  i've arrived for your little ones! lol 

i guess we really are going to do this BFing thing!  lol

at this point, the girls were brought up to our room after being discharged from the NICU, so, i started to try and BF once my "milk" came in.  it still felt like i had some colostrum, and maybe some milk....  the first question i was asked was...

after i winced, of course...

how does it feel?  does it feel good? 

WEIRD.  oh yeah, it feels awesome!  (sarcasm)

since they were preemies, they were more immature with their latching, suckling... throughout my entire stay, i saw four lactation consultants.  i had never BF before, so it felt quite strange and i think i may have looked quite silly.  it's like: 

how do you position her? without looking stupid?  lol

and 

gimme some credit... it's my first time.  i only can try one baby for now... sorry about the other one next door in her own NICU room.  i'll try her next. 

the girls wouldn't stay latched or we'd have trouble with the latching, i'd have to get them on/off again, and it was very time-consuming.  yet, they did start to catch on!  the LCs helped, but mostly, it was motherly instinct... you learn how to hold your boob so the baby can latch on (like a sandwich in her mouth), you feel if it's incorrect because it won't drain your boob.  a lot of it is paying attention to the smallest of details/mistakes.

by my second real day of breastfeeding, i tried tandem breastfeeding football-style (top left).  for feeding them simultaneously, you need TONS of pillows.  thankfully, the hospital has many of them to share :)  (at home, i use the Double Blessings' ez-2 Nurse). for breastfeeding, you need help for them to latch on if you're new.  with twins?  you definitely need help especially if you want to feed them tandem.  you get one on, and then have help getting the other on.

it's not as hard as it looks.  i was DETERMINED.  yes, i mean, it's challenging, but honestly?  the most time-consuming part is getting the girls in their positions beside you (on both sides) and the pillows/seating in order.  everything else just falls into place.  i heard a joke or some comment somewhere that we purposely have two boobs to breastfeed twins.  LOL! :)  it's nice to BF both at the same time because you save time and your getting relief in both at once... plus, you get to look down, see your little creations and you're just in awe of whom you delivered.

meanwhile, i was still pumping in-between feeding them... at night, when they'd wake up, which was just about every two hours (sometimes, one hour!), i'd ask my husband to bring me a baby to feed her... we lost so much sleep those nights... lol.  but, i was adamant that i didn't want them to have formula if i could feed them.  i needed to feed as much as possible for MY relief... not just for them.

i didn't pump as much i should have in the hospital, though... towards the end once my milk came in (remember, i was there for seven days postpartum).  take advantage, though! BF/pump/BF/pump/BF/pump!  that's all you feel that you do in the beginning! it's like... FEED, FEED, FEED, FEED... and, sometimes they take FOREVER to latch/eat, etc... stick with it.  it's well worth it.

even though i had many postpartum complications at this rate, i was still determined as ever to BF once we got home… my goal was to BF exclusively…

CD brands

here are all of the CD brands that i found in no particular order.  the key is below the links.

Amazon List of CD


BubuBibi$*
Thirsties*
bumkins*
Bummis*
TotsBots*
FuzziBunz*
earth, mom and baby*
Flip Diapers*
Kawaii Diapers$*
Comfy Rumps$
Econobum$
Blissful Booty^  
KCK One by Nicole^
Nana Pants by Betsy^
envibum^
Monkey and Bug+
TKCuddlers+
SoftBums-
Happy Heinys-*
Rumparooz- 
the good mama
weehuggers
Green Mountain Diapers
Blueberry Diapers
Kushies
bumGenius*
itti bitti
RagaBabe
Smartipants
Sandy's Cloth Diapers
GroVia
Kissaluvs
Nifty Nappy
Sweet Pea Diapers
Sweet Lil Bumbums
Loveybums
bestbottom diapers

* i recommend/have this brand
+ custom-made
$ very inexpensive, whether it's a small family business or manufactured in china in a fair, safe work environment
^ small family business
- has preemie/NB sizes

why CD?

when you hear cloth diapers, your first question may be "WHY?"  why should we use them?  well, i found five great sites explaining the advantages of CD... so, read on if you will:

Why
Use
Cloth 
Diapers
?

quite brilliantly put, don't you think?  enough said. :)

MY twins' traveling checklist (for a weekend)

note: modify for your needs, whether you have one child or more than two children.

babies/baby:
- 2 carseats
- 2 rattles on the carseats
- 2 blankets
- 4-6 swaddling blankets*
- caps/lids in a little baggy
- 4-8 pacifiers in a little baggy in the diaper bag
- 4 pjs
- 6-7 matching outfits (with headbands, socks, shoes, sweaters, pants, etc...)*
- 2 kids' books
- travel-size baby shampoo/body wash, baby detergent, cloth diaper detergent*
- travel-size shampoo and conditioner*
- baby lotion*
- nail clippers
- a makeshift mobile*
- 1 jug of room temperature water (for formula)
- can of formula
- formula bottles
- 2 hooded bath towels*
- washcloths*
- burp cloths*
- kids' music
- stroller*
- bathing suit*


for CD:
- cloth diapers (i brought almost all of mine minus the 36 prefolds that i have- 12 prefolds, 10 fitted diapers, 10 diaper covers, 2 AIO's, 2 Pocket Diapers)*
- travel-size diaper spray, water bottle*
- wet bag
- disposable liners/cloth wipes in a freezer-size ziploc bag


for you, mommy:
- 2 magazines
- 2 books
- iPad/iPod/computer, already charged, with charger
- camera, already charged, with charger
- cell, already charged, with charger
- pump*
- pump attachments in a freezer-size ziploc bag
- hands-free bra
- bottles (i brought all of mine for my pump) in a freezer-size ziploc bag
- nipples in a little baggy
- pump car adapter
- 2 nursing tanks (i brought black; more versatile)
- sleeping nursing bra
- nude and black nursing bras
- jeans
- 3 shirts
- 1 pair of leggings
- 2 pairs of sandals
- 1 pair of shoes
- thick socks (if winter)
- 1 jacket
- socks/undergarments
- makeup
- 3-4 reusable water bottles


*tips-
- the swaddling blankets are great to use to prop up the babies' bottles in their carseats.
- pack the outfits/headbands/shoes/socks/pants/sweaters in  a freezer-size ziploc bag... easy to grab an outfit and get them ready!
- get inexpensive (in the $1 bin) small bottles for your baby shampoo/wash, baby detergent, cloth detergent, shampoo, conditioner, diaper spray and water bottles!  and LABEL each of them!
- always keep a diaper spray bottle and water bottle in your diaper bag!  one less thing to pack!
- i was almost out of my baby lotion, so i left it there... one less thing to pack!
- leave items at location so you don't have to repack them in the future, such as baby lotion, bath towels, detergents, washcloths, burp cloths
- make a mobile out of black/white construction paper or print these printables here and make your own... tape to the back of the car seat!
- bathing suit depends on the season, of course.
- a stroller is unnecessary UNLESS you're traveling a lot during your trip/flying... getting in/out of the car for a far/long distance.  takes up too much room if you don't need it!- make sure all of the CD are dry... :) do one load of laundry at your destination a day.  hang/air-dry. 
- pump every three hours whether your kids are sleeping or not... AKA... in the car, they're sleeping, time to pump?  PUMP!
- pack in a huge suitcase for the entire family instead of lots of little bags.
- pack extra (we had to stay an extra day due to car trouble, and THANK GOD, i had packed enough for the girls and us).
- pack for a few days... not last minute!
- gather things as you think of them; set aside.
- do all of your laundry long beforehand.
- put your kids on the play gym/in the carseats or bouncers if you want them in the room with you while packing, BUT the easiest solution: pack ONCE they are sleeping!
- check the destination's weather constantly for any changes, but pack for cold, warm, and hot weather (blankets help the cold).
- pack two outfits for every day you'll be there +1.  three days?  3 x 2 +1 = 7 outfits. :)
- leave the ziploc bags in your suitcase once you unpack!
 - bonus: if you have outfits left over in the baggies, then you have already outfits for when you return!  or, you can keep them for the next trip!  or, you can put them in your diaper bag as your go-to-outfits! :)
- if you don't want to do laundry for CD when away, then bring enough for your entire trip.

first car trip!

so, we went on our first road trip this past weekend.  i'm amazing that we even returned in one piece considering everything that happened.  here's the scoop of how it all went down:

- i used the checklists as a guidance for my packing, but ultimately, i had to recreate my own, which i feared would eventually happen. :) 
- it was unbelievable how much to take for a baby, let alone two... and, for our pups.  lol
- i'm the worst packer in the world because it takes me forever and i'm a perfectionist, but 99% of what i packed was for them... major improvement!
- it took five and a half hours driving there (usually four and a half with no stops). 
- they slept ALMOST the whole way.  amazing!!!  they got an A if i were to grade them!
- only coral bliss was quite fussy for a bit when we first got on the freeway, and i pulled over (gab was in the backseat with them because i'd have to pump soon), put the hazards on, and held her for about 15 minutes.  after that, she literally slept so well. ;)
- i pumped in the car with my awesome adapter (and, the entire weekend when the girls were sleeping/had already eaten!).
- we went to my cousin's bridal shower where the girls were the mini celebrities!  lol
- saw family and some friends, including my friend and her identical twin boys who are 17 days younger than mine.
- used CD the entire trip EXCEPT some of my diapers weren't dry, so we brought them and hung them around the car to dry... LOL!!!  also, we were forced to do sposies because we didn't have anymore... the sun/outside hadn't dried them enough from the previous day...
- we had car trouble when we tried to leave in the worst weather around... very rainy, cold, overcast, and the tire wasn't holding the air... oh great, yes, please, let's drive five hours with that!
- we stayed an extra night to get the tire fixed, tried to buy new tires, and they didn't have ours.
- we left, the girls slept most of the way, only waking to eat, and about 100 miles out of phoenix, we had a tire blowout on the FREEWAY.  AWESOME!  the tire literally shredded.
- we have to drive the remaining distance going 50mph with our hazards in the right lane.
- when we were five minutes or so away from our house, the girls started to fuss... can you blame them?  it had taken six and a half hours!!!  they got an A- for effort, but it wasn't truly their fault!
- all in all, would i travel again by car?  yes.  we had a good trip even though one of us was quite cramped in the backseat...

traveling checklist

in the future, i know that we plan on traveling with our little gals.   i love to make checklists as they're in my nature, but, do i really want to spend the time originating the list or adding to another?  i'd prefer the latter... part of the teacher in me... building off someone else's ideas.  here are the checklists/wealth of information that i found from the following sites:

1.  BabyCenter
2. YeahBaby
3. Family Vacation Getaways
4. eHow (this one has so many more links on good information; seriously, bookmark this one!)

i'll have to accommodate for twins, and if i come up with something different, then i'll add/create my own list...

happy traveling!

cloth diapers- my intro (part 2)

to start with the prefold system was a great beginning to CD for us.  since it's unbleached cotton, you need to wash/rinse the diapers about six times... it's such a relief when that final load is done.  i guess i shouldn't complain; my mom did all the work when she was visiting!  we started CD night before she left.

i asked gabriel to set up the diaper spray, which he did, and i put the first CD on one of our babies (don't remember who).  my mom was flying out very early in the morning... and we started around 11p.m.  when that next diaper change came a few hours later, gabriel volunteered to change her.  boy, was that a mistake!!!

our daughter completely initiated that diaper, CD, us into CDing... with the MOTHER LOAD of all loads... OMG!  his eyes really widened... my mom and i were laughing forever... at 3a.m. when we were all so exhausted.  we went to use the diaper spray for the first time, washed the diaper, and threw it into the diaper wet bag in the diaper pail.

at this point, pretty sure that this is when my husband started to regret agreeing to CD... lol.  we weren't ready to switch over completely, so i started to CD during the day while i was home with them.  whenever he watched them, he'd throw a sposie on them.  he wasn't comfortable with it yet.  we were both learning.

yet, i was determined to make it work.  we needed to save $.  i didn't want to spend it on ridiculous diapers.

the girls still didn't have a predictable time frame for their booty business, so i'd have to use the disposable liner for almost each changing because i didn't want the prefold to already stain...

so far, so good... we were going to do this.

cloth diapers- my intro

forgive me... this post has not only been a long one coming, but i didn't quite know how to word it.... nonetheless, here we go.

growing up, we had tons of cloth diapers as "rags" around the house.  they were ever so soft, and i learned, very early, that my mom put my brother and me in cloth diapers when we lived in guatemala.  for some reason, i always envisioned myself doing the same thing... whenever i had children.  

when we found out that we were pregnant, i planned on CDing.  my husband grew up with CD and we both agreed to it (sometimes, i don't think men understand what they agree to until it's reality before their very own eyes- lol).  when we found out that we were having TWINS, i knew hands down that we would do this.  why, do you ask?  mostly because i didn't want to spend unnecessary $$$ on things that i could rather spend on something else.  

i was surprised at my findings/research.  as i expressed my desire to do CD to my mom, she mentioned a diaper service immediately following the hospital... until i could get a handle on the idea of CD.  as i went onto a diaper service's website, i was floored.  i felt disgusted.  absolutely dumbfounded.  i read the statistics about diaper rash, disposables, cancer-linked chemicals, a former chemical that used to be in tampons years ago, waste, our planet, potty training, $ spent on sposies, the history of cloth diapers, the risk for infertility, a risk of more UTIs...

still, i couldn't believe it.  could this be the reason so many have infertility challenges nowadays?  linked to cancers?  but, WHY is it that they keep some chemicals in there that ARE banned NOW in tampons and in europe!?  how, in the world can we put those next to our babies' bottoms?  i watched a video from envibum's site, and my stomach sickened.  wow... that's really what is in THOSE diapers?! 

i knew that i had to CD.  knowing all of this information, i couldn't weaken myself and lose myself to paying for sposies every week... for what type of return, investment?  just throwing $ away.  do we throw our clothes away?  our underwear if it's dirty? 

i started asking around... asking friends who did CD and their reasonings... and i felt lost.  it was information overload.  i didn't know what type of CD to start/buy, and i felt frustrated because it seemed like it could be such an easy decision, but it wasn't!  prefolds, fitted, all-in-one, covers... what?!  isn't there a pros/cons to each?!  oh boy.  

so, my mom started picking up things for me... the Gerber prefolds, diaper pins, and rubber pants.  the way she started.  i knew that there were MUCH cuter diapers, but i knew that it'd be a pricier amount to start up with two babies.  we'd have to be patient to get those.  meanwhile, at showers, my disposable diapers' supply grew and grew... i felt guilty even having them.

in the hospital, they were placed in sposies, and i felt so guilty because of the dangers of sposies.  yet, their bums were so small (they each weighed less than 5 lbs.) and quite bony without much fat since they were four weeks early... most CD start at 6-8 lbs... when we got home, we were changing 10-12 diapers/day.  i only had what my mom got for us, and it clearly wasn't enough to get me going, as well as my girls' bums were too small to even start.  so, we waited until they were five weeks old.  

my mom was in town visiting (her third) and we kept running errands around town... primarily baby stores (that's when you know that your life has changed- lol).  we looked at the Gdiapers at babies 'r us, and thought they seemed quite expensive, complicated... and, they didn't have the size to accommodate my little beauties. :(  a mom there told us that costco had CD... online.  we checked it out.  a three-part system.  the worst part about buying things online is not knowing what type of product it is until it's in front of your face.  the mom also mentioned this store in scottsdale, zoolikins.  little did i know i had already visited that store's site, as well as it was on my blog's links!  lol

we all went to zoolikins the following day... i wanted my husband to be apart of the process.  we bought their "simplicity" package, the diaper spray, disposable liners, and cloth wipes after learning a lot of information.  we went with the similar process my mom did.  why?
1.  my girls weren't quite 6lbs. yet
2. i didn't know if i'd be able to really KEEP with CD
3. didn't want to spend $ that i'd later regret by not keeping with it

my mom advised me to not switch completely until we got a grasp on CD and use sposies at night.  i decided to stop using the ones that people gave us and use seventh generation's diapers that were chlorine free, gel-free.  i felt somewhat better.  

yet, i still wanted to exclusively CD...